For reasons that may be almost entirely cathartic, understanding that for the next few hundred words I will be slipping into some sort of alternate reality, here is the article I wish I could write:

From the moment Senator McCain took the stage, he was an entity unseen thus far during this campaign season. He was rough and ready, yet presidential and self-assured. He was, from the get-go, on the attack without coming across as desperate and mean-spirited. He was a spitfire, feisty and on the best roll of his political career. He was, for the first time, the incontestable better of Barack Obama, not just in substance (a given), but in performance and appearance. 

Perhaps Obama, not a particularly distinguished debater to begin with, was somewhat staggered, having been accustomed to a previously amiable (some say weak) McCain … or maybe the challenges flung at him were simply encumbered with too much truth to aptly handle. Either way, the debate, much to the chagrin of even those that lap water from the bowls of the main-stream-media, was a clear victory last night for John McCain.

Obama wasn’t any worse than he had been in previous showings, mind you … McCain was just that much better.

Two times during the debate, for instance, McCain employed a masterfully conceived strategy. He voluntarily ended his comments before his allotted time had expired – visibly throwing Obama from his game, albiet momentarily. It achieved maximum effect. McCain knew when to cut himself off once his critical points had been made, stinging his opponent as much as he impressed his audience, finishing by asking Obama (with Bill O Reilly flair), “What say you, Senator?” 

The first time – arguably the most effective (and memorable) – McCain was relentless. Never have I seen McCain this good. He said: 

“Partisanship is one thing, Senator, but your intellectual dishonesty here is, frankly, embarrassing. My belief that ‘the less regulation there is the better’ holds true for the free markets. Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac were not pure free-market entities. You know that. They were government backed babies that were in dire need of regulation – just as my party advocated, and that your party denied … I ask you to look the American people squarely in the eye and tell them, if you can, that your party – in the spirit of the partisanship that you are so keen to harp on – was not at least as responsible for this mess as anyone was – and if you can say it in good conscience, than America should vote for you. What say you, Senator Obama?” 

Brilliant!  

There were still twenty seconds left in his block of time. 

Obama even commented: “I’ll take the time if John is willing to give it out.”

It didn’t help him. Obama blathered on about fairness, or something like that. 

McCain then unleashed on Obama, calling the Messiah’s tax cut plan for 95% of the American people dishonest and nothing more than a “handout to millions that don’t even pay income tax.” He went on to say that America was not about “promising government gifts to win votes.” 

And thankfully … not once was “Wall Street greed” mentioned by McCain. 

About half-way through the proceedings, after another predictable Obama attack on the wealthy, McCain had clearly had enough: 

“This class warfare stance of yours – this ‘them’ and ‘us’ approach just doesn’t sound like unity, Senator. The so-called ‘wealthy’ that you seem to think can handle your proposed tax increases - the small business owner with five or ten employees – they help create jobs in this country, Senator. And surely you understand how business in the real world operates. You raise taxes on entities that create products and provide services and keep people employed, who do you think pays the ultimate price? Customers and employees, that’s who! The very people you supposedly want to protect with your plan. You know that.” 

It was the second “You know that” of the night, and it was no less successful. 

As expected, the bulk of the give-and-take focused on the current financial crisis - and McCain, no less than three times, espoused the importance of personal responsibility, calling it an “a foundational American ideal.” He even threw in what many after-show pundits consider the best line of the night when he said, “We are responsible and accountable to our actions – from the decisions we make, to the paths we travel, down to the acquaintances we keep, where the statute of limitations on what is right, honorable and true is without border or boundary …” 

William Ayers anyone? 

Well done. 

It was the performance desperately needed by Republicans – the grand slam, the hail-mary game-winning touchdown, the- 

And so on and so forth.

Middle Eastern peace, Osama Bin Ladin’s conversion to Judaism, and this article written next Thursday morning …